Martone-isms

Jeff's seemingly stream-of-consciousness commentary was one of the best parts of the weekend. Here are some of my favorite Martone-isms (coinage courtesy of Chris Bloom).

And yes, I seriously wrote these down in my kettlebell manual. They were worth saving.

On not training kettlebells to failure... "It's not bodybuilding. Bodybuilders don't think they've had a good workout until they're walking out towards their car with their keys in their hands shaking like an epileptic chihuahua."

On having a back-up plan in case a client is getting tired mid-workout... "If they start having a hard time snatching, move to cleans. If they get too tired for cleans, move to one arm swings. And if their one arm swings start looking like polio, well... you get the idea."

And my favorite quote, seemingly aimed directly at me and my trainer... "If you're gonna be stupid, then you have to be tough."

Finally, more of a lesson learned than an actual quote... when delivering a narrative, frequently repeating the phrase, "Long story short..." effectively distracts your audience from the fact that your story is, in fact, quite long.

I mean, this stuff is pure gold. You know what I mean?